Act Two, Scene Two

SCENE II. A room in the castle.
Enter KING CLAUDIUS, QUEEN GERTRUDE, ROSENCRANTZ, GUILDENSTERN, and Attendants

KING CLAUDIUS
Welcome, dear Rosencrantz and Guildenstern!
Moreover that we much did long to see you,
The need we have to use you did provoke
Our hasty sending. Something have you heard
Of Hamlet's transformation; so call it,
Sith nor the exterior nor the inward man
Resembles that it was. What it should be,
More than his father's death, that thus hath put him
So much from the understanding of himself,
I cannot dream of: I entreat you both,
That, being of so young days brought up with him,
And sith so neighbour'd to his youth and havior,
That you vouchsafe your rest here in our court
Some little time: so by your companies
To draw him on to pleasures, and to gather,
So much as from occasion you may glean,
Whether aught, to us unknown, afflicts him thus,
That, open'd, lies within our remedy.

The King has summoned two boyhood friends of Hamlet to try to ascertain what is wrong with him. Claudius remarks that both physically and mentally, the Prince is much changed from earlier times, but cannot think of the reason other than his father’s death. We can assume that his desire to get to the bottom of Hamlet’s behaviour is motivated both by a paternal concern and the political ‘optics’ of having a close relative who is attracting much negative attention. Notice should also be given to the skill with which the master politician manipulates Rosencrantz and Guildenstern, flattering their egos by telling them they really wanted to see them anyway.

QUEEN GERTRUDE
Good gentlemen, he hath much talk'd of you;
And sure I am two men there are not living
To whom he more adheres. If it will please you
To show us so much gentry and good will
As to expend your time with us awhile,
For the supply and profit of our hope,
Your visitation shall receive such thanks
As fits a king's remembrance.

Gertrude echoes this tone of flattery but goes further, promising the young men they will be amply rewarded for their visit.

ROSENCRANTZ
Both your majesties
Might, by the sovereign power you have of us,
Put your dread pleasures more into command
Than to entreaty.

GUILDENSTERN
But we both obey,
And here give up ourselves, in the full bent
To lay our service freely at your feet,
To be commanded.

The two schoolfellows, who Shakespeare does not intend for us to like, respond to the King and Queen in a tone that can only be described as obsequious, typical of those trying to curry favour from their superiors.

KING CLAUDIUS
Thanks, Rosencrantz and gentle Guildenstern.

QUEEN GERTRUDE
Thanks, Guildenstern and gentle Rosencrantz:
And I beseech you instantly to visit
My too much changed son. Go, some of you,
And bring these gentlemen where Hamlet is.

In all my years of teaching the play, I never found anything to distinguish Rosencrantz from Guildenstern. Since Claudius uses the adjective ‘gentle’ to describe Guildenstern, and Gertrude uses the same word to describe Rosencrantz, I think it is safe to assume Shakespeare never intended them to be seen as individuals, but rather as a type. This will become more evident shortly.

GUILDENSTERN
Heavens make our presence and our practises
Pleasant and helpful to him!

QUEEN GERTRUDE
Ay, amen!
Exeunt ROSENCRANTZ, GUILDENSTERN, and some Attendants
Enter POLONIUS
LORD POLONIUS
The ambassadors from Norway, my good lord,
Are joyfully return'd.

KING CLAUDIUS
Thou still hast been the father of good news.

LORD POLONIUS
Have I, my lord? I assure my good liege,
I hold my duty, as I hold my soul,
Both to my God and to my gracious king:
And I do think, or else this brain of mine
Hunts not the trail of policy so sure
As it hath used to do, that I have found
The very cause of Hamlet's lunacy.

KING CLAUDIUS
O, speak of that; that do I long to hear.

LORD POLONIUS
Give first admittance to the ambassadors;
My news shall be the fruit to that great feast.

KING CLAUDIUS
Thyself do grace to them, and bring them in.

Undoubtedly, Polonius rather enjoys the extra-special position in which he has cast himself. By withholding his ‘discovery’ about Hamlet’s madness, he guarantees himself ‘center-stage’ after Cornelius and Voltimand exit.

Exit POLONIUS

He tells me, my dear Gertrude, he hath found
The head and source of all your son's distemper.

It’s to be noted that whenever Hamlet is seen in a negative light, Claudius refers to him when speaking to Gertrude as your son.

QUEEN GERTRUDE
I doubt it is no other but the main;
His father's death, and our o'erhasty marriage.

Here we see here the beginning of competing theories about Hamlet’s ‘madness.’ Not completely morally blunted, Gertrude sees the death of King Hamlet compounded by her hasty marriage to Claudius as the explanation.

KING CLAUDIUS
Well, we shall sift him.
Re-enter POLONIUS, with VOLTIMAND and CORNELIUS
Welcome, my good friends!
Say, Voltimand, what from our brother Norway?

VOLTIMAND
Most fair return of greetings and desires.
Upon our first, he sent out to suppress
His nephew's levies; which to him appear'd
To be a preparation 'gainst the Polack;
But, better look'd into, he truly found
It was against your highness: whereat grieved,
That so his sickness, age and impotence
Was falsely borne in hand, sends out arrests
On Fortinbras; which he, in brief, obeys;
Receives rebuke from Norway, and in fine
Makes vow before his uncle never more
To give the assay of arms against your majesty.
Whereon old Norway, overcome with joy,
Gives him three thousand crowns in annual fee,
And his commission to employ those soldiers,
So levied as before, against the Polack:
With an entreaty, herein further shown,
Giving a paper
That it might please you to give quiet pass
Through your dominions for this enterprise,
On such regards of safety and allowance
As therein are set down.

KING CLAUDIUS
It likes us well;
And at our more consider'd time well read,
Answer, and think upon this business.
Meantime we thank you for your well-took labour:
Go to your rest; at night we'll feast together:
Most welcome home!

It seems that Claudius’ bold foreign policy initiative has succeeded. Having informed the Norwegian King of Fortinbras’ plans, the latter has stopped his nephew, who has vowed to never again attack Denmark. In exchange for this promise, old Norway allows the lad to keep his soldiers and gives him an annual payment, both to be used now against the Polish King.

The success of Claudius’ gambit attests to his effectiveness as a political leader and the saviour of potentially thousands of lives.

Exeunt VOLTIMAND and CORNELIUS

LORD POLONIUS
This business is well ended.
My liege, and madam, to expostulate
What majesty should be, what duty is,
Why day is day, night night, and time is time,
Were nothing but to waste night, day and time.
Therefore, since brevity is the soul of wit,
And tediousness the limbs and outward flourishes,
I will be brief: your noble son is mad:
Mad call I it; for, to define true madness,
What is't but to be nothing else but mad?
But let that go.

QUEEN GERTRUDE
More matter, with less art.

Never one to shrink from attention, Polonius, enjoying the ‘power’ that his ‘knowledge’ of Hamlet’s condition gives him, prolongs the suspense through his verbosity, earning a sharp rebuke from an exasperated Gertrude, who essentially tells him to get to the point.

LORD POLONIUS
Madam, I swear I use no art at all.
That he is mad, 'tis true: 'tis true 'tis pity;
And pity 'tis 'tis true: a foolish figure;
But farewell it, for I will use no art.
Mad let us grant him, then: and now remains
That we find out the cause of this effect,
Or rather say, the cause of this defect,
For this effect defective comes by cause:
Thus it remains, and the remainder thus. Perpend.
I have a daughter--have while she is mine--
Who, in her duty and obedience, mark,
Hath given me this: now gather, and surmise.

Undaunted by the Queen’s impatience, Polonius continues on in a pedantic manner, intent on showing how witty he is, although the audience sees the ‘foolish figure’ he refers to as himself. Even the use of the word ‘perpend’ instead of ‘consider’ or ‘think about it’ betrays his pretentiousness and self-importance.

Reads
'To the celestial and my soul's idol, the most
beautified Ophelia,'--
That's an ill phrase, a vile phrase; 'beautified' is
a vile phrase: but you shall hear. Thus:

Even as he reads this letter, Polonius can’t resist making a bit of literary criticism.

Reads
'In her excellent white bosom, these, & c.'

QUEEN GERTRUDE
Came this from Hamlet to her?

LORD POLONIUS
Good madam, stay awhile; I will be faithful.
Reads
'Doubt thou the stars are fire;
Doubt that the sun doth move;
Doubt truth to be a liar;
But never doubt I love.
'O dear Ophelia, I am ill at these numbers;
I have not art to reckon my groans: but that
I love thee best, O most best, believe it. Adieu.
'Thine evermore most dear lady, whilst
this machine is to him, HAMLET.'
This, in obedience, hath my daughter shown me,
And more above, hath his solicitings,
As they fell out by time, by means and place,
All given to mine ear.

So much is Ophelia the obedient and dutiful daughter that she has turned over the most intimate details of her relationship with Hamlet which, as we see, Polonius has no reluctance to share with his royal audience. While it can be argued that he is doing so with a noble purpose in mind, the degree to which he violates his daughter’s privacy is striking.

KING CLAUDIUS
But how hath she
Received his love?

LORD POLONIUS
What do you think of me?

KING CLAUDIUS
As of a man faithful and honourable.

LORD POLONIUS
I would fain prove so. But what might you think,
When I had seen this hot love on the wing--
As I perceived it, I must tell you that,
Before my daughter told me--what might you,
Or my dear majesty your queen here, think,
If I had play'd the desk or table-book,
Or given my heart a winking, mute and dumb,
Or look'd upon this love with idle sight;
What might you think? No, I went round to work,
And my young mistress thus I did bespeak:
'Lord Hamlet is a prince, out of thy star;
This must not be:' and then I precepts gave her,
That she should lock herself from his resort,
Admit no messengers, receive no tokens.
Which done, she took the fruits of my advice;
And he, repulsed--a short tale to make--
Fell into a sadness, then into a fast,
Thence to a watch, thence into a weakness,
Thence to a lightness, and, by this declension,
Into the madness wherein now he raves,
And all we mourn for.

If we recall Polonius’ earlier words to his daughter, we realize he is now indulging in a bit of revisionist history in explaining why he told Ophelia to sever her relationship with Hamlet. It certainly would be impolitic for him to tell the King and Queen that he didn’t trust the Prince, believing he was out to simply exploit his daughter sexually. On the other hand, saying as he does now that she was ‘out of his league’ makes him sound like the humble servant of royalty who knows his and his family’s place. Clearly, Claudius is not the only one who knows how to manipulate people.

KING CLAUDIUS
Do you think 'tis this?

QUEEN GERTRUDE
It may be, very likely.

LORD POLONIUS
Hath there been such a time--I'd fain know that--
That I have positively said 'Tis so,'
When it proved otherwise?

KING CLAUDIUS
Not that I know.

LORD POLONIUS
[Pointing to his head and shoulder]
Take this from this, if this be otherwise:
If circumstances lead me, I will find
Where truth is hid, though it were hid indeed
Within the centre.

So confident is this ‘wise old counselor’ of his theory that he tells the King to sever his head from his body if he is wrong.

KING CLAUDIUS
How may we try it further?

The King, ever shrewd and cautious, wants proof of Polonius’ deduction.

LORD POLONIUS
You know, sometimes he walks four hours together
Here in the lobby.

QUEEN GERTRUDE
So he does indeed.

Apparently Hamlet has adopted the habit of pacing around the lobby for hours on end, perhaps in the hope of overhearing something that may verify the story told to him by the ghost. There are those who have speculated that his persona of a madman may make people less guarded in what they when he is around, assuming that he is really not taking things in as a ‘lucid’ person would.


LORD POLONIUS
At such a time I'll loose my daughter to him:
Be you and I behind an arras then;
Mark the encounter: if he love her not
And be not from his reason fall'n thereon,
Let me be no assistant for a state,
But keep a farm and carters.

The always confident Polonius proposes a bit of spying (notice the development of this motif) to prove his theory. I have always found the phrase “I'll loose my daughter to him” rather ugly, making it seem as if he is preparing to sic his dog on someone. The diction also suggests that he views his daughter as a property or possession to do with as he will. Indeed, as mentioned earlier, this entire sequence shows a total indifference to Ophelia’s feelings, exposing, as it does, her intimate relationship with Hamlet.

KING CLAUDIUS
We will try it.

QUEEN GERTRUDE
But, look, where sadly the poor wretch comes reading.

LORD POLONIUS
Away, I do beseech you, both away:
I'll board him presently.
Exeunt KING CLAUDIUS, QUEEN GERTRUDE, and Attendants

The next sequence, among other things, affords the opportunity for a little bit of comic relief, something commonly used in tragedies to relieve some of the tension that has developed. John Dover Wilson was of the opinion that Hamlet actually overheard the preceding conversation about using Ophelia to spy on Hamlet, but as with many of Wilson’s contentions, there is nothing in the text to specifically support it, although it is one explanation for the manner in which the Prince speaks to Polonius here.

As well, it should be noted that Hamlet speaks to Polonius here in prose instead of the blank verse that predominates in the play. The reason here is that he is donning the role of the madman; blank verse would be considered too elevated a form of expression for an ‘addled’ mind.

Enter HAMLET, reading
O, give me leave:
How does my good Lord Hamlet?

HAMLET
Well, God-a-mercy.

LORD POLONIUS
Do you know me, my lord?


HAMLET
Excellent well; you are a fishmonger.

This is yet another instance of the play’s dramatic irony as we begin to see Hamlet using his adopted ‘antic disposition’ as an excuse for insulting Polonius; since madmen cannot be held accountable for their words and actions, he has considerable latitude here, and he starts by calling the counselor a fishmonger, which can be interpreted either as a seller of fish, an insult to a man in Polonius’ elevated position, or a procurer of women for the purposes of prostitution. The latter interpretation would seem particularly apt considering how the old man plans to ‘use’ his daughter with Hamlet. Presumably, the Prince has also inferred that he is responsible for the termination of his relationship with Ophelia.

LORD POLONIUS
Not I, my lord.

HAMLET
Then I would you were so honest a man.

LORD POLONIUS
Honest, my lord!

HAMLET
Ay, sir; to be honest, as this world goes, is to be
one man picked out of ten thousand.

Despite his act with Polonius, he is revealing here how he perceives the world. His cynicism about honesty again reminds us of his shattered idealism.

LORD POLONIUS
That's very true, my lord.

HAMLET
For if the sun breed maggots in a dead dog, being a
god kissing carrion,--Have you a daughter?

LORD POLONIUS
I have, my lord.

HAMLET
Let her not walk i' the sun: conception is a
blessing: but not as your daughter may conceive.
Friend, look to 't.

Perhaps here, Hamlet is simply trying to cause Polonius concern about the virtue of his daughter.

LORD POLONIUS
[Aside] How say you by that? Still harping on my
daughter: yet he knew me not at first; he said I
was a fishmonger: he is far gone, far gone: and
truly in my youth I suffered much extremity for
love; very near this. I'll speak to him again.
What do you read, my lord?

The above exchange seems to serve as even greater encouragement to Polonius’ theory as he draws comparisons to his own behaviour when he was a youth.

HAMLET
Words, words, words.

LORD POLONIUS
What is the matter, my lord?

HAMLET
Between who?

LORD POLONIUS
I mean, the matter that you read, my lord.

By interpreting each question literally, Hamlet continues to ‘string along’ the old man.

HAMLET
Slanders, sir: for the satirical rogue says here
that old men have grey beards, that their faces are
wrinkled, their eyes purging thick amber and
plum-tree gum and that they have a plentiful lack of
wit, together with most weak hams: all which, sir,
though I most powerfully and potently believe, yet
I hold it not honesty to have it thus set down, for
yourself, sir, should be old as I am, if like a crab
you could go backward.

Offered yet another opportunity to insult Polonius, a man he clearly detests, Hamlet pretends he is reading a description of old men described as having grey beards, wrinkled faces, eyes crusted with vile crust, weak minds and weak thighs, words clearly meant to cruelly describe the old counselor.

LORD POLONIUS
[Aside] Though this be madness, yet there is method
in 't. Will you walk out of the air, my lord?

HAMLET
Into my grave.

LORD POLONIUS
Indeed, that is out o' the air.
Aside
How pregnant sometimes his replies are! a happiness
that often madness hits on, which reason and sanity
could not so prosperously be delivered of. I will
leave him, and suddenly contrive the means of
meeting between him and my daughter.--My honourable
lord, I will most humbly take my leave of you.

HAMLET
You cannot, sir, take from me any thing that I will
more willingly part withal: except my life, except
my life, except my life.


LORD POLONIUS
Fare you well, my lord.

HAMLET
These tedious old fools!

Hamlet’s last comment here confirms what we have really known all along: he has simply been playing a role in order to express his contempt for Polonius.

Enter ROSENCRANTZ and GUILDENSTERN

LORD POLONIUS
You go to seek the Lord Hamlet; there he is.

ROSENCRANTZ
[To POLONIUS] God save you, sir!
Exit POLONIUS
GUILDENSTERN
My honoured lord!

ROSENCRANTZ
My most dear lord!

HAMLET
My excellent good friends! How dost thou,
Guildenstern? Ah, Rosencrantz! Good lads, how do ye both?

ROSENCRANTZ
As the indifferent children of the earth.

GUILDENSTERN
Happy, in that we are not over-happy;
On fortune's cap we are not the very button.

HAMLET
Nor the soles of her shoe?

ROSENCRANTZ
Neither, my lord.

HAMLET
Then you live about her waist, or in the middle of
her favours?

GUILDENSTERN
'Faith, her privates we.

HAMLET
In the secret parts of fortune? O, most true; she
is a strumpet. What's the news?

As soon as Rosencrantz and Guildenstern enter, Hamlet’s demeanour changes from that of a ‘madman’ to a very gracious and witty fellow, sharing a bit of a lewd jest with his former schoolfellows. His use of prose in this encounter is what would be expected in addressing people far below his station in life. However, his mood quickly alters as he discerns that theirs is not a casual visit prompted by friendship.

ROSENCRANTZ
None, my lord, but that the world's grown honest.

HAMLET
Then is doomsday near: but your news is not true.
Let me question more in particular: what have you,
my good friends, deserved at the hands of fortune,
that she sends you to prison hither?

It has been suggested by some that once Hamlet discerns Rosencrantz and Guildenstern’s visit is prompted by ulterior motives, the Prince begins to engage in a battle of wits with them, a battle it quickly becomes evident they are ill-equipped to fight.

GUILDENSTERN
Prison, my lord!

HAMLET
Denmark's a prison.

ROSENCRANTZ
Then is the world one.

HAMLET
A goodly one; in which there are many confines,
wards and dungeons, Denmark being one o' the worst.

ROSENCRANTZ
We think not so, my lord.

HAMLET
Why, then, 'tis none to you; for there is nothing
either good or bad, but thinking makes it so: to me
it is a prison.

ROSENCRANTZ
Why then, your ambition makes it one; 'tis too
narrow for your mind.

HAMLET
O God, I could be bounded in a nut shell and count
myself a king of infinite space, were it not that I
have bad dreams.

Again, it has been suggested that Hamlet is now leading the lads on to draw the inference that it is his thwarted ambition that makes him regard Denmark as a prison. What ambition has been thwarted? When we consider that he says he could consider himself “a king of infinite space” except that he has “bad dreams,” the implication is that he wanted to become the King after his father’s demise. In fact, except for a reference late in the play, there is nothing to explicitly support the notion that Hamlet actually harboured such an ambition, but it may be that he is trying to sow further confusion over the reason for his mental condition. Of course, on the other hand, to suggest this to two people he already realizes are the King’s agents would be reckless, to say the least, since Claudius, already wary of him due to his strange behaviour, is not the type of person to ignore a threat to his security.

GUILDENSTERN
Which dreams indeed are ambition, for the very
substance of the ambitious is merely the shadow of a dream.

HAMLET
A dream itself is but a shadow.

ROSENCRANTZ
Truly, and I hold ambition of so airy and light a
quality that it is but a shadow's shadow.

HAMLET
Then are our beggars bodies, and our monarchs and
outstretched heroes the beggars' shadows. Shall we
to the court? for, by my fay, I cannot reason.


ROSENCRANTZ GUILDENSTERN
We'll wait upon you.

HAMLET
No such matter: I will not sort you with the rest
of my servants, for, to speak to you like an honest
man, I am most dreadfully attended. But, in the
beaten way of friendship, what make you at Elsinore?

Undoubtedly, Hamlet has in mind the two standing in front of him when he talks about being “dreadfully attended.”

ROSENCRANTZ
To visit you, my lord; no other occasion.

HAMLET

Beggar that I am, I am even poor in thanks; but I
thank you: and sure, dear friends, my thanks are
too dear a halfpenny. Were you not sent for? Is it
your own inclining? Is it a free visitation? Come,
deal justly with me: come, come; nay, speak.

GUILDENSTERN
What should we say, my lord?


HAMLET
Why, any thing, but to the purpose. You were sent
for; and there is a kind of confession in your looks
which your modesties have not craft enough to colour:
I know the good king and queen have sent for you.

ROSENCRANTZ
To what end, my lord?

HAMLET

That you must teach me. But let me conjure you, by
the rights of our fellowship, by the consonancy of
our youth, by the obligation of our ever-preserved
love, and by what more dear a better proposer could
charge you withal, be even and direct with me,
whether you were sent for, or no?


ROSENCRANTZ
[Aside to GUILDENSTERN] What say you?

HAMLET
[Aside] Nay, then, I have an eye of you.--If you
love me, hold not off.

GUILDENSTERN
My lord, we were sent for.

I have always found the above sequence to be rather amusing; Rosencrantz and Guildenstern’s inability to think of a response to Hamlet’s question of whether or not they were sent for clearly reveals their relative lack of intelligence. Instead, they ask him what they should say, and then look at each other and talk in a whisper – clearly no match for the melancholy Dane!

HAMLET
I will tell you why; so shall my anticipation
prevent your discovery, and your secrecy to the king
and queen moult no feather. I have of late--but
wherefore I know not--lost all my mirth, forgone all
custom of exercises; and indeed it goes so heavily
with my disposition that this goodly frame, the
earth, seems to me a sterile promontory, this most
excellent canopy, the air, look you, this brave
o'erhanging firmament, this majestical roof fretted
with golden fire, why, it appears no other thing to
me than a foul and pestilent congregation of vapours.
What a piece of work is a man! how noble in reason!
how infinite in faculty! in form and moving how
express and admirable! in action how like an angel!
in apprehension how like a god! the beauty of the
world! the paragon of animals! And yet, to me,
what is this quintessence of dust? man delights not
me: no, nor woman neither, though by your smiling
you seem to say so.

The above is a powerful speech, filled with imagery revelatory both of Hamlet’s true emotional state and Shakespeare’s keen insight into the human condition. I used to ask my students to draw a line down their page, on one side listing the positive language used to describe the world and humanity, and on the other side the negative diction. The list looked something like this:

POSITIVE NEGATIVE

“this goodly frame, the earth” “sterile promontory”
“most excellent canopy, the air”
“this brave o’erhanging firmament”
“this majestical roof fretted “a foul and pestilent
with golden fire” congregation/Of vapours”

man:
“noble in reason” “infinite
in faculty” “how like an angel!”
“how like a god”
“the beauty of the world” “this quintessence of dust”
“the paragon of animals”

When added to Hamlet’s description of his abandonment of exercise and loss of mirth, has there ever been a more compelling yet succinct description of the depressed mind? That is exactly what Hamlet is revealing to his two ‘friends,’ without, of course, telling them why he feels thus. Anyone familiar with depression will know that it is usually characterized by a complete loss of interest in life, coupled with the sense that the world has nothing of comfort or inspiration to offer. One is usually cognizant intellectually of the goodness to be found in the world, but cannot grasp that goodness emotionally, precisely the condition being revealed by the melancholy Prince here.

ROSENCRANTZ
My lord, there was no such stuff in my thoughts.

HAMLET
Why did you laugh then, when I said 'man delights not me'?

ROSENCRANTZ
To think, my lord, if you delight not in man, what
lenten entertainment the players shall receive from
you: we coted them on the way; and hither are they
coming, to offer you service.

HAMLET
He that plays the king shall be welcome; his majesty
shall have tribute of me; the adventurous knight
shall use his foil and target; the lover shall not
sigh gratis; the humourous man shall end his part
in peace; the clown shall make those laugh whose
lungs are tickled o' the sere; and the lady shall
say her mind freely, or the blank verse shall halt
for't. What players are they?


ROSENCRANTZ
Even those you were wont to take delight in, the
tragedians of the city.

Rosencrantz’s revelation that a troupe of actors Hamlet was very fond of in the city will soon be arriving in Elsinore will spawn a series of events with far-reaching consequences. What follows is Shakespeare’s very plausible explanation for their presence which might otherwise be seen as too much of a coincidence.

HAMLET
How chances it they travel? their residence, both
in reputation and profit, was better both ways.

ROSENCRANTZ
I think their inhibition comes by the means of the
late innovation.

HAMLET
Do they hold the same estimation they did when I was
in the city? are they so followed?

ROSENCRANTZ
No, indeed, are they not.

HAMLET
How comes it? do they grow rusty?

ROSENCRANTZ
Nay, their endeavour keeps in the wonted pace: but
there is, sir, an aery of children, little eyases,
that cry out on the top of question, and are most
tyrannically clapped for't: these are now the
fashion, and so berattle the common stages--so they
call them--that many wearing rapiers are afraid of
goose-quills and dare scarce come thither.

In response to Hamlet’s query as to why the actors are ‘on the road,’ Rosencrantz explains that troupes of child actors are now the fashion, and have displaced the regulars. This, in fact, was occurring during Shakespeare’s time, and the pejorative way in which they are discussed here makes it clear that The Bard was not a fan of this fad.

HAMLET
What, are they children? who maintains 'em? how are
they escoted? Will they pursue the quality no
longer than they can sing? will they not say
afterwards, if they should grow themselves to common
players--as it is most like, if their means are no
better--their writers do them wrong, to make them
exclaim against their own succession?

As Hamlet correctly points out, if this fad continues, the child actors, once their voices change, will be out of work and thus the authors of their own career demises.

ROSENCRANTZ
'Faith, there has been much to do on both sides; and
the nation holds it no sin to tarre them to
controversy: there was, for a while, no money bid
for argument, unless the poet and the player went to
cuffs in the question.

HAMLET
Is't possible?

GUILDENSTERN
O, there has been much throwing about of brains.

HAMLET
Do the boys carry it away?

ROSENCRANTZ
Ay, that they do, my lord; Hercules and his load too.

HAMLET
It is not very strange; for mine uncle is king of
Denmark, and those that would make mows at him while
my father lived, give twenty, forty, fifty, an
hundred ducats a-piece for his picture in little.
'Sblood, there is something in this more than
natural, if philosophy could find it out.

Commenting on this twist of thespian fate, Hamlet wryly and bitterly comments that this change in theatrical allegiances doesn’t really surprise him, especially given the fact that the very people who used to mock Claudius behind his back before he became King now pay substantial amounts of money for miniature portraits of him. It is difficult to know whether the Prince is accurately portraying how Claudius was perceived before ascending to the throne, given his animus toward his uncle, although the fickleness of people, especially when part of a group, was a favorite theme of Shakespeare.

Flourish of trumpets within

GUILDENSTERN
There are the players.

HAMLET
Gentlemen, you are welcome to Elsinore. Your hands,
come then: the appurtenance of welcome is fashion
and ceremony: let me comply with you in this garb,
lest my extent to the players, which, I tell you,
must show fairly outward, should more appear like
entertainment than yours. You are welcome: but my
uncle-father and aunt-mother are deceived.

GUILDENSTERN
In what, my dear lord?

HAMLET
I am but mad north-north-west: when the wind is
southerly I know a hawk from a handsaw.

Hamlet can safely reveal to these two that he is not really crazy, knowing that they will never grasp what he is telling them.

Enter POLONIUS

LORD POLONIUS
Well be with you, gentlemen!

HAMLET
Hark you, Guildenstern; and you too: at each ear a
hearer: that great baby you see there is not yet
out of his swaddling-clouts.

ROSENCRANTZ
Happily he's the second time come to them; for they
say an old man is twice a child.

Rosencrantz readily joins in the mockery of Polonius as Hamlet implies that the old man is senile.

HAMLET
I will prophesy he comes to tell me of the players;
mark it. You say right, sir: o' Monday morning;
'twas so indeed.

LORD POLONIUS
My lord, I have news to tell you.

HAMLET
My lord, I have news to tell you.
When Roscius was an actor in Rome,--

LORD POLONIUS
The actors are come hither, my lord.

HAMLET
Buz, buz!

LORD POLONIUS
Upon mine honour,--

HAMLET
Then came each actor on his ass,--

LORD POLONIUS
The best actors in the world, either for tragedy,
comedy, history, pastoral, pastoral-comical,
historical-pastoral, tragical-historical, tragical-
comical-historical-pastoral, scene individable, or
poem unlimited: Seneca cannot be too heavy, nor
Plautus too light. For the law of writ and the
liberty, these are the only men.

By now, I suspect even the most tolerant reader/audience member would be growing weary of Polonius. Here, ever the expert on everything, he waxes pedantic, presumably to show his superior knowledge of the theatre. For reasons that will become apparent a little later, it is important for Shakespeare’s purposes that our sympathies for the garrulous old man be limited.

HAMLET
O Jephthah, judge of Israel, what a treasure hadst thou!

LORD POLONIUS
What a treasure had he, my lord?

HAMLET
Why,
'One fair daughter and no more,
The which he loved passing well.'

LORD POLONIUS
[Aside] Still on my daughter.

HAMLET
Am I not i' the right, old Jephthah?

LORD POLONIUS
If you call me Jephthah, my lord, I have a daughter
that I love passing well.

HAMLET
Nay, that follows not.

LORD POLONIUS
What follows, then, my lord?

HAMLET
Why,
'As by lot, God wot,'
and then, you know,
'It came to pass, as most like it was,'--
the first row of the pious chanson will show you
more; for look, where my abridgement comes.

That Hamlet addresses Polonius as Jephthah is quite significant here. As told in the Old Testament’s Book of Judges, Jephthah was one of the judges of Israel who made a vow to God in exchange for a victory against the Ammonites. He would sacrifice, as a burnt offering, the first person who came out his house to greet him on his return. As fate would have it, that person turned out to be his only child, his virgin daughter. He kept his vow. When we couple this designation with his earlier calling Polonius a fishmonger, it is clear that Hamlet sees Polonius as one who is sacrificing his daughter for his own purposes.

At this point, Hamlet turns his attention to the arrival of the players, greeting them warmly as old friends. Very noticeable to us, but apparently not to Polonius, is the complete change in his demeanour from one who is addled to one completely lucid, giving us yet again a glimpse of what the Prince must have been like before the events of the play:

Enter four or five Players
You are welcome, masters; welcome, all. I am glad
to see thee well. Welcome, good friends. O, my old
friend! thy face is valenced since I saw thee last:
comest thou to beard me in Denmark? What, my young
lady and mistress! By'r lady, your ladyship is
nearer to heaven than when I saw you last, by the
altitude of a chopine. Pray God, your voice, like
apiece of uncurrent gold, be not cracked within the
ring. Masters, you are all welcome. We'll e'en
to't like French falconers, fly at any thing we see:
we'll have a speech straight: come, give us a taste
of your quality; come, a passionate speech.

The wit of his remarks show the lucidity of Hamlet’s thoughts as he jokes about an actor who has grown a beard since he last saw him, and observes that another who usually plays the girls’ roles has grown and he hopes his voice has not yet changed. His familiarity with the actors suggests Hamlet was formerly an avid patron of the arts.

First Player
What speech, my lord?

HAMLET
I heard thee speak me a speech once, but it was
never acted; or, if it was, not above once; for the
play, I remember, pleased not the million; 'twas
caviare to the general: but it was--as I received
it, and others, whose judgments in such matters
cried in the top of mine--an excellent play, well
digested in the scenes, set down with as much
modesty as cunning. I remember, one said there
were no sallets in the lines to make the matter
savoury, nor no matter in the phrase that might
indict the author of affectation; but called it an
honest method, as wholesome as sweet, and by very
much more handsome than fine. One speech in it I
chiefly loved: 'twas Aeneas' tale to Dido; and
thereabout of it especially, where he speaks of
Priam's slaughter: if it live in your memory, begin
at this line: let me see, let me see--
'The rugged Pyrrhus, like the Hyrcanian beast,'--
it is not so:--it begins with Pyrrhus:--
'The rugged Pyrrhus, he whose sable arms,
Black as his purpose, did the night resemble
When he lay couched in the ominous horse,
Hath now this dread and black complexion smear'd
With heraldry more dismal; head to foot
Now is he total gules; horridly trick'd
With blood of fathers, mothers, daughters, sons,
Baked and impasted with the parching streets,
That lend a tyrannous and damned light
To their lord's murder: roasted in wrath and fire,
And thus o'er-sized with coagulate gore,
With eyes like carbuncles, the hellish Pyrrhus
Old grandsire Priam seeks.'
So, proceed you.

LORD POLONIUS
'Fore God, my lord, well spoken, with good accent and
good discretion.

Hamlet’s love for and knowledge of the theatre is evident in the above speech as he recites from memory something he had once heard the player recite. Observing that the play was rarely if ever performed, as it dealt with matters and used language that was of little interest to the masses, Hamlet is revealed as a person of considerable intellect and refinement, not surprising for one who has been to Wittenberg University.

It has long been debated amongst critics as to whether the specific content of this ‘passionate’ speech is germane to the play, or just the effect that it has on Hamlet. In any event, the speech is referring to the slaughter of King Priam of Troy, (father of Paris, the man who abducted Helen and thus caused the Trojan War) at the hands of Pyrrhus, who has just emerged from the Trojan Horse.


First Player
'Anon he finds him
Striking too short at Greeks; his antique sword,
Rebellious to his arm, lies where it falls,
Repugnant to command: unequal match'd,
Pyrrhus at Priam drives; in rage strikes wide;
But with the whiff and wind of his fell sword
The unnerved father falls. Then senseless Ilium,
Seeming to feel this blow, with flaming top
Stoops to his base, and with a hideous crash
Takes prisoner Pyrrhus' ear: for, lo! his sword,
Which was declining on the milky head
Of reverend Priam, seem'd i' the air to stick:
So, as a painted tyrant, Pyrrhus stood,
And like a neutral to his will and matter,
Did nothing.

Just as he is about to kill Priam, Pyrrhus’ sword pauses mid-arc as he becomes momentarily distracted by the sound of the city of Troy crashing around him. As we shall see by later events, this delay may relate thematically to Hamlet’s behaviour.

But, as we often see, against some storm,
A silence in the heavens, the rack stand still,
The bold winds speechless and the orb below
As hush as death, anon the dreadful thunder
Doth rend the region, so, after Pyrrhus' pause,
Aroused vengeance sets him new a-work;
And never did the Cyclops' hammers fall
On Mars's armour forged for proof eterne
With less remorse than Pyrrhus' bleeding sword
Now falls on Priam.
Out, out, thou strumpet, Fortune! All you gods,
In general synod 'take away her power;
Break all the spokes and fellies from her wheel,
And bowl the round nave down the hill of heaven,
As low as to the fiends!'

Relentless and remorseless, Pyrrhus fulfills his mission.

LORD POLONIUS
This is too long.

HAMLET
It shall to the barber's, with your beard. Prithee,
say on: he's for a jig or a tale of bawdry, or he
sleeps: say on: come to Hecuba.

Hamlet openly expresses his contempt for Polonius here, who seems bored by the recitation.

First Player
'But who, O, who had seen the mobled queen--'

HAMLET
'The mobled queen?'

LORD POLONIUS
That's good; 'mobled queen' is good.

Ever the expert, Polonius attempts to regain some dignity by confirming the validity of a phrase that Hamlet seems unfamiliar with.

This next sequence, which describes the terrible suffering of Priam’s wife, Queen Hecuba, has a tremendous impact on Hamlet, for reasons that will soon become apparent:

First Player
'Run barefoot up and down, threatening the flames
With bisson rheum; a clout upon that head
Where late the diadem stood, and for a robe,
About her lank and all o'er-teemed loins,
A blanket, in the alarm of fear caught up;
Who this had seen, with tongue in venom steep'd,
'Gainst Fortune's state would treason have
pronounced:
But if the gods themselves did see her then
When she saw Pyrrhus make malicious sport
In mincing with his sword her husband's limbs,
The instant burst of clamour that she made,
Unless things mortal move them not at all,
Would have made milch the burning eyes of heaven,
And passion in the gods.'

LORD POLONIUS
Look, whether he has not turned his colour and has
tears in's eyes. Pray you, no more.

The passionate recitation of Hecuba’s trauma in witnessing her husband being hacked to death by Pyrrhus has caused the actor to turn pale and cry.

HAMLET
'Tis well: I'll have thee speak out the rest soon.
Good my lord, will you see the players well
bestowed? Do you hear, let them be well used; for
they are the abstract and brief chronicles of the
time: after your death you were better have a bad
epitaph than their ill report while you live.

LORD POLONIUS
My lord, I will use them according to their desert.

HAMLET
God's bodykins, man, much better: use every man
after his desert, and who should 'scape whipping?
Use them after your own honour and dignity: the less
they deserve, the more merit is in your bounty.
Take them in.

Hamlet rebukes Polonius by telling him that if all people were treated as they deserved, everyone would wind up being whipped, another expression of cynicism on the part of the Prince.

LORD POLONIUS
Come, sirs.

HAMLET
Follow him, friends: we'll hear a play to-morrow.
Exit POLONIUS with all the Players but the First
Dost thou hear me, old friend; can you play the
Murder of Gonzago?

First Player
Ay, my lord.

HAMLET
We'll ha't to-morrow night. You could, for a need,
study a speech of some dozen or sixteen lines, which
I would set down and insert in't, could you not?

First Player
Ay, my lord.

HAMLET
Very well. Follow that lord; and look you mock him
not.
Exit First Player
My good friends, I'll leave you till night: you are
welcome to Elsinore.

ROSENCRANTZ
Good my lord!

HAMLET
Ay, so, God be wi' ye;
Exeunt ROSENCRANTZ and GUILDENSTERN

The second of the play’s great soliloquies is about to begin, shedding new light on Hamlet:

Now I am alone.
O, what a rogue and peasant slave am I!
Is it not monstrous that this player here,
But in a fiction, in a dream of passion,
Could force his soul so to his own conceit
That from her working all his visage wann'd,
Tears in his eyes, distraction in's aspect,
A broken voice, and his whole function suiting
With forms to his conceit? and all for nothing!
For Hecuba!
What's Hecuba to him, or he to Hecuba,
That he should weep for her? What would he do,
Had he the motive and the cue for passion
That I have? He would drown the stage with tears
And cleave the general ear with horrid speech,
Make mad the guilty and appal the free,
Confound the ignorant, and amaze indeed
The very faculties of eyes and ears. Yet I,
A dull and muddy-mettled rascal, peak,
Like John-a-dreams, unpregnant of my cause,
And can say nothing; no, not for a king,
Upon whose property and most dear life
A damn'd defeat was made. Am I a coward?
Who calls me villain? breaks my pate across?
Plucks off my beard, and blows it in my face?
Tweaks me by the nose? gives me the lie i' the throat,
As deep as to the lungs? who does me this?
Ha!
'Swounds, I should take it: for it cannot be
But I am pigeon-liver'd and lack gall
To make oppression bitter, or ere this
I should have fatted all the region kites
With this slave's offal: bloody, bawdy villain!
Remorseless, treacherous, lecherous, kindless villain!
O, vengeance!
Why, what an ass am I! This is most brave,
That I, the son of a dear father murder'd,
Prompted to my revenge by heaven and hell,
Must, like a whore, unpack my heart with words,
And fall a-cursing, like a very drab,
A scullion!
Fie upon't! foh! About, my brain! I have heard
That guilty creatures sitting at a play
Have by the very cunning of the scene
Been struck so to the soul that presently
They have proclaim'd their malefactions;
For murder, though it have no tongue, will speak
With most miraculous organ. I'll have these players
Play something like the murder of my father
Before mine uncle: I'll observe his looks;
I'll tent him to the quick: if he but blench,
I know my course. The spirit that I have seen
May be the devil: and the devil hath power
To assume a pleasing shape; yea, and perhaps
Out of my weakness and my melancholy,
As he is very potent with such spirits,
Abuses me to damn me: I'll have grounds
More relative than this: the play 's the thing
Wherein I'll catch the conscience of the king.
Exit

In this soliloquy, the catalyst for which is the player’s passionate speech, Hamlet’s introspectiveness, capacity for self-criticism and ambivalence about the ghost are all highlighted. That he has been deeply affected by the actor’s capacity to experience passion and emotion over a fictional entity, Hecuba, is readily apparent. However, this very capacity leads the Prince to begin berating himself as he wonders how the man would behave had he the real-life motivation that Hamlet has to act, based on what he has learned from the ghost. He concludes that his performance would be such that he would overwhelm all around him.

This conclusion causes Hamlet to look at himself in very harsh terms. He infers that because he has done nothing tangible toward accomplishing the mission given to him, he is a coward who would put up with any indignity offered to him. Otherwise, he would have killed Claudius by now:
or ere this
I should have fatted all the region kites
With this slave's offal: bloody, bawdy villain!
Remorseless, treacherous, lecherous, kindless villain!
O, vengeance!

The above passage marks the emotional climax of the soliloquy, expressing as it does the terrible hatred he feels toward Claudius. However, Hamlet is not yet through with his self-denigration; as a result of his emotional outburst, he speaks ironically of how brave he is yelling and screaming like a whore in the streets.
Having gotten this out of his system, he has an abrupt change of mood, becoming analytical as he contemplates his next move, a plan presaged by his request to the player to memorize some lines that he wants to insert into The Murder of Gonzago, the play they will be presenting the next evening. Hamlet says that he has heard that those guilty of a crime will sometimes be so moved by a scene in a play that they will betray their guilt. Consequently, he will have the actors play something resembling the alleged murder of the King while he carefully observes Claudius for any indications of guilt.
The last part of the soliloquy is a reminder of Hamlet’s moral caution in this entire exercise, and may lead us to conclude that his earlier self-flagellation over not having already killed Claudius really was not justified. Surely something that has been in the back of his mind all along, he expresses the reservation that the ghost he has conversed with could indeed be an evil spirit masquerading as his father in order to get him to do something that will result in his damnation. The enactment of the play will resolve the question, one way or another.

SOME CONSIDERATIONS OF ACT 2
Thus the act ends on a note of suspense and foreshadowing as the audience eagerly awaits the outcome of the play within this play. Although not especially prominent in the act, the fact is that Hamlet is also a detective story; as the Prince made clear in his soliloquy, it is morally incumbent upon him to determine whether or not the ghost’s story about his father’s murder is true. However, as we will see, once that mystery is solved, a new one will emerge around Hamlet and his behaviour and motivations.
Act 2 saw the advance of the theme of the disparity between appearances and reality, largely centering around the roles that people play. For example, Hamlet, for the most part, is playing the part of a madman, perhaps in his quest to determine the truth about his uncle. Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are playing the role of friends concerned about the well-being of their old schoolfellow. Unwittingly, Polonius is continuing to play the role of wise old counselor and doting father as it becomes increasingly clear than neither attribute is true. The question left unanswered as yet is whether Claudius is playing the biggest and deadliest role, that of rightful King and concerned stepfather to Hamlet while hiding his true nature, fornicator and assassin.
The spying motif was also developed in the act, first through the agency of Reynaldo, dispatched by Polonius to find out what Laertes has been up to in Paris, and then by his plan to use Ophelia to help confirm his theory that Hamlet is suffering from unrequited love for her by spying on the two of them when they next meet. Readers perhaps at this point will begin to realize that this motif is not irrelevant to the play’s main plot, as will become evident in Act 3.
As well, in this Act we begin to see, through Polonius’ theory and his plan to use his daughter, how the Romantic Subplot is getting closer to the point where it will ultimately merge with the Revenge Plot.